The Winter of Our Discontent

There is a party going on over at my house.  A pity party that is.  For one thing, I have the flu.  Or something.  I confess it's self-diagnosed.  But it's been hanging around making me miserable for days now.  I missed Rocco's funeral.  And, my dogs will be the first to tell you, I've also missed my obligations as a pet owner for days now.  They're fed and have water, but they're missing most of their walks, and I'm getting these sorrowful looks and whines from Cheyenne like I just beat her.  She does love her walk.  Maybe more than she loves me.  She lives for that twice a day event and has a built in clock that's uncanny.  Six in the morning and 6:30 at night - boom, she's ready!  But, with a head that's pounding, a back that's aching and a nose that's running, the LAST thing I'm going to do is walk around in single digit temperatures - I haven't even gone to get today's mail.  So, I'm sitting here watching the Westminster Dog Show (which I don't think Cheyenne really likes that I do either - I genuinely think she gets a little jealous when I coo over all these purebred beauties), thinking back to fall longingly.  In my other blog I wrote an article toward the end of August where I finished up with a picture of my little house in snow and captioned that I was dreaming of the time it looked like that again.  Good Lord!  Be very careful what you wish for!  Because this has been a long, brutal winter.  What was I thinking?!

I grew up loving winter, but I had a child's love of snow.  Which comes from playing in it and then going inside to hot cocoa with marshmallows by the fire.  It didn't take into account shoveling the stuff, driving on it and trying to mollify active dogs while not allowing them to succumb to hypothermia.  That's what parents are for!  And it sure didn't involve paying the heating bill!  My Texas friends are having a little fun at my expense and reminding me I chose to live here.  And I did.  And I'm glad I did, despite all of it.  But, I'll confess I now understand why so many Pennsylvanians winter in Florida.

Since most of us who work don't have that luxury, here are a former southerner's tips for surviving a northern cold snap:

• Flannel sheets.  Get some.  I understand electric blankets are making a comeback, but I don't really want to worry about my covers shorting out and shocking me in the middle of the night.  And with good quality flannel sheets, I'm telling you, you don't need one.
• To live here, you'll need boots.  And I mean the functional kind. I moved here with these killer boots - several pairs.  I can put your eye out with the heel on one pair of black beauties I own.  They are shoved way in the back of my closet gathering dust.  I haven't worn them since the first year I lived here.  I have a nifty pair of riding boots now that have a minimal heel and good tread for when I want to look fashionable, but not slip on the muck that are downtown Pittsburgh sidewalks.  I am also on my second pair of rain boots and just replaced my snow boots.  The first pair of rain boots I got from a leading discount chain and wore out in literally weeks.   Now I would say to just go for the better quality.  When it comes to reliable cold weather footwear, you probably get what you pay for.
• They salt their streets here.  It works for the reason they do it: it melts snow.  It does other things too. It's corrosive for one.  It's not just the weather eating away at the Pittsburgh infrastructure here, it's all the stuff we use to combat it.  That means that salt-ridden snow that's coating your car?  Yeah, it's eating away at your car too.  But, when it's sub-zero for days on end, it's hard to do much about it.  If you look closely at the cars that have been on the road for several years here, you'll see it - the corrosion and rust.  Many Pittsburghers seem more or less resigned to that fact.  Not me.  I love my car.  So, when we had a warming trend a couple of weeks ago I sat in a very long line at the car wash to clean it off.  I'll do it again as soon as I can.  On the in between days, I'll vaguely fret over what all that salt is doing to my baby.  I opted for a special coating on my car when I bought it.  Time will tell if it helps.  But my best advice to anyone who is like me is don't let your car sit unwashed any longer than you have to.  It's murder on your dogs paws too, by the way.  Since booties was an epic fail, I'm looking at other options.
• Slow and steady wins the race.  As wonderful as people in this city tend to be, there is something that happens to people when they get behind the wheel of a car.  They morph like evil transformers and try to destroy all others in their path.  In bad weather, most of them tend to calm down.  They don't have a death wish anymore than you do after all.  But for some, the tendency to cut someone off from their exit or to swerve quickly in front of them is just too deeply ingrained, I guess, so be very careful and keep a big distance between the car in front of you.  There may not be atheists in fox holes, but I can tell you, there aren't many on Route 28 in a snow storm either!
• Interior pipes do freeze.  Hopefully your exterior faucets are long since shut off.  But I was caught by surprise during our first arctic blast when my upstairs shower stopped draining and the cold water wouldn't turn on.  The exposure to the cold and the wind on that exterior wall had frozen the water in the pipes.  Now I can tell you what to do to avoid that.  And what not to do.  Panic does not help, I can tell you from experience.  Epsom salts down the drain did.  
• There is beauty in all seasons.  Don't get so freaked out that you miss out on that fact.  If you're from a warmer climate, all this snow, ice, salt, freezing pipes and dogs who are making you insane with their cabin fever can make you both fearful to go out unless you have to and hate it when you do.   But, stop for a moment when the snow is falling and look around.  Let some fall softly on your face.  Look around on a winter morning and try not to see the ice-crusted streets or the dirty mounds of snow the plows have made.  See the soft virgin snow in your neighbor's backyard instead.  Go sledding.  Go skating.  Enjoy winter.  Unless you've got the flu, but even that shall pass.  I hope anyway.